this is some bullshit.

21:40
Why is it that at any time of the week I can get absolutely obliterated from drinking alcohol? I can legally poison myself to the point of being incapacitated or dead, and yet the government says that I can't legally smoke marijuana? I watched a video the other day of a guy that was obviously extremely drunk, stumbling out of an elevator, vomiting, slipping on his own vomit and then continuing to vomit while lying on the floor helpless. Aside from the fact that it was hilarious to watch, it made me really sad. It made me sad because people are suffering, people are dying, people are having uncontrollable seizures, people aren't able to eat, people are in chronic pain, and yet the government allows this to happen. The government allows this injustice, this disgusting crime against humanity where they allow hundreds of thousands of people to suffer because of what? Because big pharmaceutical companies can't make money off of marijuana? Because it's a "drug"? Because it grows out of the ground? What is the reason? 1 in 5 people in Australia suffer from chronic pain, and the Australian government give them the option of buying expensive prescription pills that cause long-term health issues, which means they need to buy more drugs to help combat the side effects of the original medication they're on, and continue to stay on all of this medication for the rest of their lives, OR they can just suffer. The Australian government is profiting off of sick people, and denying our right to choose what we put in our bodies. At what point is it ever okay for the government to dictate what I do to my own body? Especially when it's legal for me to consume as much alcohol and smoke as many cigarettes as I want. These weird standards of what the government deems fit for people to consume is just sickening and hypocritical.



On a slightly less depressing note, I am STILL thinking about the terrifying abyss of nothingness that is death. When these thoughts are heightened, I find that I become more and more self-aware of how meaningless my existence is. Meaningless because when I die, there will be nothing left. I will leave only memories, and they will die with the people that knew me. And my consciousness will no longer exist, and I will float away back into the universe as dust and potentially turn into a star or something like that. My physics gets a little hazy from that point on. And by physics I mean stuff that I learn off the internet and from Neil deGrasse Tyson and Carl Sagan. I'd like to know what it's like to not be afraid of death. I mean, I have known what it's like for short instances, where I've felt an overwhelming sense of calmness and warmth and that no matter what everything is going to be alright... but that feeling is only temporary (if you catch my drift) and then I'm back to the stark reality that is life. I know people that aren't afraid of dying. I know people that aren't afraid of dying because they believe in some form of reincarnation or after life, or they too believe in the "nothingness" concept and I guess are just legit hard asses that don't give a fuck. I sort of wish sometimes that I was religious. It'd be nice to be able to exercise my human desire to have faith and believe in something bigger than myself. I think it'd be easier sometimes to be like that. Those people seem so sure of themselves and their life. Obviously I think religion is not real and that it's all made up, but it's like when you believed in Santa Claus, and then when that stupid cunty kid at school blabs that he's not real, and you pretend to yourself for a while that the kid was just lying and that Santa Claus really is real, but deep down you know that he isn't and it's all just been a lie... That feeling of believing in Santa Claus is a nice feeling. And you don't get that feeling very often in life.

I've realised that when I eat sliced apple with peanut butter on top, that the amount of peanut butter I'm consuming appears to be small due to the slices of apple, however upon further investigation it's actually a fuck load. Like the other day, I cut up an apple and added my peanut butter, and then was like, holy hell if I scooped all this peanut butter up into one mound, it would be a shameful amount of peanut butter to consume in one sitting. Obviously I still ate all the peanut butter, but I made a pact with myself to cut back on the PB consumption. Whether I stick to that pact is another story.

I'm 5 episodes into Magical Egypt, the John Anthony West documentary series on ancient Egypt. Goodness gracious me. First of all, if you don't know about the water erosion theory on ancient Egypt, basically it's suggested that the first Egyptian civilization or old Egypt is actually way older than what was first predicted. Looking at the erosion on the sphinx and other key ruins from the time, many geologists, historians and Egyptologists believe that old Egypt now dates back to around 36,000 BC. The interesting part is that when you look at the astronomical processional cycle in 36,420 BC, all monuments of Giza align perfectly with the major constellations. And on top of that, it's suggested that the third millennium BC of Egyptian civilization was actually a carry over from the civilization that pre-dated it. Meaning that the new Egyptians actually acknowledged that their civilization was the remains of an older and more advanced culture. This old civilization was extremely advanced in mathematics, science, astronomy and medicine, and traditional historians severely underestimate how intellectually progressive this civilization was. We still can't even figure out how the Egyptians built most of their structures, how they knew what they were doing and how they knew what they knew to begin with. And when you look at the structures, they are built on a foundation of mathematical systems, astronomical symbolism and sacred geometry (the Temple of Karnak is said to be built on the template of the Fibonacci series). Anyway, I am not doing this series any justice, so just go and watch it on youtube right now.

I had a conversation the other day with a moderate Muslim man about why women are expected to cover themselves up for "modesty" in Islam and this is how the conversation unfolded:
Him: "We see a woman's beauty as perfection, and that you need to protect it."
Me: "Protect from what? From men? From god?"
Him: "Well if I see a woman in a bikini, I'm going to perv on her..."
Me: "Well then shouldn't that be on you and not the woman's responsibility?"
Him: "Well that's just the way we're built."
Me: "But if that's the way god made you, then why do you need to protect women in the first place?"

And then the conversation fizzled out from there. I really would've liked to have heard his justification, but someone chimed in on the conversation and changed the subject so we never got to the crux of it. I'm not making this shit up either. It actually happened. And as touching as it is to me, that the Islamic male population feel that it is their responsibility to protect my beauty from the prying eyes of themselves, I'd rather just let them be actual men, and take responsibility for their actions and believe that they have the strength, that they have the power (from god maybe?) to restrain themselves from doing anything other than just looking at me. Or maybe women should just wrap blindfolds around men and then the issue would be solved? Or should we just embrace the fact that god made you as pervs and enjoy walking around with a bed sheet covering us in 40 degree heat for the rest of our lives? What an empowering way to live! And all because god made you that way. Where do I sign up?!

I don't like how psychedelics get such a bad wrap. First of all, just a quick reminder that psychedelics were the catalyst for the counter-culture in the 1960's. Psychedelics were at the heart of the social justice movements like feminism, free speech, civil rights, sexuality, anti-war, anti-government... not to mention a mass expansion in spiritual consciousness. And then Nixon came in with his "war on drugs" and completely fucked everything up. You know what angers me a lot, is that one person, one absolute shit lord, can have so much impact from just one decision. He just made one choice, and now we are still living with the repercussions of that insane "war". That war was a war on the people. It was a war on the people that saw through the illusion of the government, that saw through the propaganda and the bullshit. And those people are dangerous. Because it's a lot harder to rule disillusioned people than it is to rule a population that's submissive and gullible. I feel like this is a metaphor right now for the way I feel about the presidential campaign. I don't mean to harp on about it, and I'm trying to be as objective as possible, but the amount of evidence of just sheer corruption that has come out from the Clinton campaign and the DNC, has me so confused at how people can still think she is the better choice. And that's coming from someone who originally was going to vote democrat. But I just can't anymore. I can't support a woman who appears to be an institutionalised politician that only cares about her own agendas that'll only benefit her and a small group of extremely wealthy people. Her pay-to-play tactics with the Clinton Foundation, her private emails, her deplorable handling of the Benghazi attacks, her preference in military intervention (and the real threat that if she gets into office Russia and Syria are next), her history with the Bilderberg Group, the fat contributions she received to her campaign from Wall Street and not to mention the disgusting behaviour of the DNC and their tactics of bird-dogging Trump rallies, conspiring against Bernie Sanders (which by the way is NOT democratic when the party colludes against someone that the people would've preferred), working closely with mainstream media to give her an advantage over Trump and committing mass voter fraud. For all of Donald Trump's flaws, he doesn't come close to Hillary Clinton's. And now we're seeing this new campaign strategy coming out about how Hillary is looking ahead of the campaign and preparing for the presidency, which I call bullshit on. We know the mainstream media oversamples democrats in their polls, so we can't believe any of their numbers. We know that Trump is leading in some major swing states, and from what I've seen, he is getting thousands and thousands of people turning out to his rallies. Hillary on the other hand seems to be getting only hundreds. Trump to me represents the biggest fuck you to the American government and mainstream media. And that's why I like him. He's not a seasoned politician with years and years of ties to big corporations and has no connection to these global elitists. And to the people that don't believe any of the evidence coming out against the Clinton campaign, you are not living in an objective reality. If you can still deny the fact that the DNC colluded against Bernie Sanders after seeing the emails, or still deny that they were infiltrating the Trump rallies to incite violence (which is illegal) after seeing Robert Creamer on camera talk about it (who by the way has visited the White House 342 times since 2009), or denying the fact that she committed multiple federal crimes, or that her foundation is embezzling money... It takes two seconds to google this, to see the emails and the videos for yourself. And if you still deny the evidence, then you're obviously more interested in your own personal truths than the actual reality of what's going on in front of you. And to be honest, the people that deny all of these claims, the people that think there is no corruption in government, or that conspiracy theories are just for crazy people, or that a global government agenda doesn't exist... those are the people that prolong this ongoing process for transparency and justice in the government. The deniers of government corruption and collusion are the people that add fuel to the fire for these wall street bankers and big pharma and big tobacco that have their claws dug so deep into the system that we need a complete exodus of government to rid the sickness that is corporate politics. And if you don't believe me, again, look at the evidence. Bernie Sanders received no large donations from Wall Street. He spoke out against the corruption of government. He spoke out against the banks. He spoke out against the 1%. And what happened to him? The DNC colluded to never have him as the Democratic nominee, and now he's forced to endorse Hillary Clinton, which I'm sure makes him sick to his stomach. They did the same thing to Kennedy. Look at the Golf of Tonkin incident. Look at Watergate. Look at the war on drugs. On top of that, the US government has played a significant role in destabalizing countries and taking advantage of underdeveloped nations by convincing leaders to accept development loans for construction and engineering projects that are be contracted out to US companies. These contracts only benefit the richest families and leave the locals even poorer than when they started. The loans by the way, give the US political influence and access to the natural resources of these countries, and in turn create the US as a global empire. And when new leaders come onto the scene, their options are either take the bribe and get rich, or you'll be removed from your position one way or another. And if they can't cause enough civil unrest through sending in CIA operatives, they just assassinate them instead and have a corrupt leader waiting on the side lines to take their place. They did it in Panama, they did it in Brazil, they did it in Ecuador, they did it in Afghanistan and Iraq (they had to invade instead), and the list goes on and on. The Federal Reserve is PRIVATE for fuck's sake. And causes perpetual debt and inflation that we can never get out of. There are privatised prisons. America has actually made it a lucrative business to incarcerate people. There are more people in prison for drug offenses than violent crimes. They are ruining people's lives because they got caught walking around with marijuana in their pocket, or for being addicted to a destructive substance. Time and time again, we see the despicable evidence of a globalized government that seeks to keep the world's wealth in the hands of an extremely small and powerful group of people. The world's richest 1% own 40% of ALL the world's wealth. If that number doesn't strike you as corrupt, than I don't know what the fuck will. It's time to wake up people. Because frankly, this is some bullshit.
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