fun facts.

19:40
Do you ever notice that when a dog is near you, when they sit down, they sit directly on top of your foot? Of all the places to put their butt hole, they put it on top of your foot. Thanks... I guess?

This week has been an interesting week. I've decided that this Smolov Jr programming I'm doing, sucks balls. Smolov Jr is a squat based program that basically makes you lift heavy, a lot. All the time. I've done two weeks of straight up back squatting and my legs are kind of dead. I wore jeans the other day and they were getting stuck around my quads when I sat down. *sigh*. Anyway, it's the third week into it and what do you know, I'm sick.

For the record, I never get sick. Also, it's Rob's fault that I'm sick. He infected me. So gross. Anyway, when I do get sick, it hits me hard and fast. And I whinge a lot. And I definitely don't feel like doing back squats at 85% + 5kg. So I haven't really done anything this week.

Oh apart from strict pull ups. What's that you say? Why yes, I can now do strict pull ups. Booyah. That's a proud moment for me. I now officially consider pull ups my bitch. Suck it pull ups. For so long you were an elusive temptress that played mind games on me... and now look at you. All non-elusive and stuff. Yeah. By the way, I still can't do butterfly pull ups consistently. So I guess it's a work in progress. But still!
suck it pull up bar.
Another milestone I hit in my training was cleaning my bodyweight at 63kg. Holla! Me being able to squat clean my bodyweight means that I should be able to now do a ring muscle up. Also, I love that in crossfit everyone openly asks you how much you weigh without any awkwardness behind it. People really don't care how much you weigh. Apart from my friend Andrei. Only because I weigh the same as him, which is an outrage because he is ridiculously strong and nimble... like a filipino ninja (he's from the Philippines).

it's weird to think that I weigh the same as that bar.
I went into the gym on Monday all cold and flu like. I decided to just roll out and mobilise (that was when I got my strict pull ups!). Anyway, one of my yoga friends from work told me that inversions are great when you're sick. So I decided to practice my handstands and handstand walks. I got a new PB on my handstand walk distance! Maybe I should be sick all the time. Not really. But it does force you to work on things that you might not usually. But I love practicing handstands so that's kind of a lie. I'll just stop now.

Erika asked me if I wanted to come over to her house for a girl's night on Saturday. And she enticed me with, "I downloaded the German bee documentary".

Am I now known as the crazy bee lady? Fun fact. I did watch a documentary on the bees when I was home sick from work this week. It was dull. And to be honest I turned it off half way through to watch a documentary about dreaming. That was way more cool. Sorry bees. I love you and your consistent effort to pollinate our food inspires me every day. I was unaware of the fact that bees are responsible for pollinating 70% of our crops. That's a huge number. And it's frightening to think that the european honey bee almost died out. What is wrong with us?

The dream documentary was fascinating! I love dreams. And I always thought I read into them too much. Like, if I have a weird dream, I always google dream symbolism to find out what it means. But apparently dreams are very symbolic and an accurate representation of how we're feeling. It's actually a more unfiltered version of our thoughts, so when we dream it's our mind saying straight up "bitch, pull it together". Or whatever. Also, I had the craziest most lucid dream I've ever had. It was awesome. So in my dream I was lying in bed and I could feel myself floating out of my body. As if my soul was just going out for a bit and it was going to leave my body all paralysed and vulnerable... did you know your body does go into a paralysed state when you're in REM sleep? REM sleep is the deeper cycle of sleeping where you dream (it's called Rapid Eye Movement). Also, they did experiments on cats where they removed the part of their brain that paralysed the body in REM sleep, so that when the cats were sleeping they'd walk around and pretend to catch mice. Scientists wanted to know what cats dreamt about. That experiment really doesn't disturb me that much because I have a dislike for cats. They also cause a brain disease in humans called toxoplasmosis. Also, cats are creepy. Back to my story. So my soul was floating out of my body, and I was fully aware of the fact that it was a dream (because this scenario has happened to me before a few times but I always freak out and wake up). This time I was like "calm the fuck down and don't mess this up!". So I just tried to relax and I felt myself float all the way up to the ceiling, and then I hit the ceiling and fell back into my body. I did this about 3 times and then I woke up out of excitement. It was awesome. Lucid dreaming is something that I'd love to invest more time in to understanding. I need more alpha brain. That helps. I just re-read over my description of my dream and it doesn't sound very exciting. I'm sorry if it was a let down for you. But it was awesome for me.

I've decided I want to make memes for everyone in the office. Or at least a lot of people in the office. I wish I could be a professional meme maker. If only I was witty and could produce one liners that made sense to all.

Pinterest makes me want to go travel and get a tattoo. It's a terrible influence. A wonderful, terrible influence. I love it. I'm really good at getting obsessed with things and then forgetting about them a couple of weeks later. Remember my stint with vine? Yeah. I deleted that app off my phone because it was taking up too much space. Sometimes I wonder about my issues with the need for instant gratification. And then I think. Oh well. I'll just eat a cookie.
I think I need this.
By the way, I made paleo ginger nut cookies tonight. They are delicious.

om nom nom nom

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